DATED : Friday, December 24, 2010
TITLED: What Has Happened To Us? Repost
TIMED: 9:28 AM
Hello! It's my comeback one-shot after the exams!Enjoy~
This is specially dedicated to Clarissa and Fangyi.
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What Has Happened To Us?
Kyuwook
Kyuhyun
Ryeowook"I cannot fathom what has happened to us,do wounds and hurt hide behind honesty?
I cannot guess what has happened to our love,
Will anything be revived after it rains?"
If there was anything to describe Kyuhyun's relationship with Ryeowook, it would be exactly these few sentences.
Once, the two had been inseparable-as though Ryeowook was Kyuhyun's shadow. Although Kyuhyun was the younger one, he was used to leading Ryeowook everywhere and anywhere. If Ryeowook was a kite flying freely in the sky, soaring over mountains, then Kyuhyun was the string attached to him, never letting go of his beloved for even one second.
But now, all that loved that the two once shared between them was now only a ghost of their past. No, Kyuhyun corrected himself, there wasn't even the faintest trace left. It had seemed that their relationship had evaporated suddenly, leaving in place only an awkward and cold-as-ice atmosphere.
"All because of Seunghyun..."Kyuhyun chewed his food glumly, never taking his eyes off Ryeowook who sat across him. The older male's eyes were downcast, but Kyuhyun could clearly notice the listlessness and unhappiness in them. His face was like a mask;it bore the same look of indifference and coldness that Ryeowook had donned on ever since the death of his elder brother Seunghyun one year ago. His mouth seemed to curve down in an eternal droop, but even this did not spoil the beauty of his face. However, while the Ryeowook one year ago would be a constant source of sunshine and warmth, this Ryeowook was like dry ice-seemingly cold yet burning simultaneously and woe betide any poor soul who dared to disrupt his dreaming yet troubled soul.
Yet, towards this new Ryeowook, Kyuhyun did not recoil in fear. In fact, all Kyuhyun felt was regret. Pure, simple regret. It was all his fault in the first place...If only he had trusted his instincts to not drive that night, Seunghyun might not have had to enter the gates of heaven. It was all his fault.
"I'm done." Kyuhyun's eyes snapped up and his mind was pulled back to reality when Ryeowook stood up and stated this plainly. He watched silently as the older male dragged his feet over to the kitchen, in his hand a plate full of leftover food that he had been pushing and poking at, rather than devouring it down.
Kyuhyun was grateful that Ryeowook decided to continue living with him even after the accident, though it was probably more of convenience than of willingness. This fact was blatantly yet painfully obvious; Ryeowook treated Kyuhyun like air, speaking to him only in short, sharp sentences filled with caution. Even when they spoke, Ryeowook didn't even look him in the eye.
"It's been a year already, how long is he going to keep this up?" Kyuhyun sighed, more in frustration than anger. No, he could never be angry at Ryeowook, even if he willed himself too. What right had he anyway? But Kyuhyun wanted to speak with his precious Wookie so much; he was dying for even a conversation with him. Just one teensy little chat...But it was more likely that Mr Tay would start fan-boying over Wonder Girls than Ryeowook would ever conscend to maintain on speaking terms with Kyuhyun.
Kyuhyun bit his lip and made his way over to the kitchen, where Ryeowook was still washing the dishes.
"Ryeowook..." Kyuhyun blurted out. He saw a flash of panic cross over Ryeowook's cold face, only to be replaced with anger and indifference settled in yet again. Ryeowook bolted out of the kitchen as though Kyuhyun had attempted to whack his head with a frying pan. Kyuhyun watched him, heart sinking to the depths of the ocean. He leaghed bitterly,"Great, I'm so repulsive that he can't even stand being in the same room as me..."
Regardless of this, Kyuhyun still made up his mind to approach Ryeowook again. Knocking on Ryeowook's ajar door gently, Kyuhyun asked meekly,"May I come in?"
Ryeowook threw him a dirty look that plainly said,"If you're already standing at my door, you can just come in, but if you're wishing that I will be a nice guy like Elmo, you've probably watched too much Sesame Street."
Kyuhyun made his way to Ryeowook's side cautiously and sat down on the floor next to him. "Ryeowook..." he tried again.
"What?" the elder male snapped back, not too successful in concealing the irritation is his voice.
Ignoring that, Kyuhyun went on,"It's been a year already, please don't be like this anymore. I've really missed you a lot. Please talk to me..."
Ryeowook cut him off unmercifully,"At least...at least I'm still here. What about Seunghyun? He's dead, and who's to blame for it? And you still dare to give me all this crap about missing me. You're a real hypocrite, Cho Kyuhyun!"
"I'm really sorry."
"Sorry? Will a simple 'sorry' bring Sunghyun back to life?" Ryeowook shrieked in derison, taunting Kyuhyun, his face contorted in s spasm of pain.
"I couldn't help it," Kyuhyun bowed his head, tears forming at the edge of his eyes. Oh, why was he so stupid to have thought Ryeowook would forgive him? Now, all he did was to dig up Ryeowook's old wound, scarring him once again.
Ryeowook could bear it no longer. Grabbing Kyuhyun up roughly by the collar, he spat into the younger male's face,"Not your fault? But who was the one behind the wheel of the car? If only you hadn't drunk before you drive, you wouldn't have crashed! Are you really that retarded? The government spends so much money to encourage people to not drink and drive, and yet you went ahead and did it anyway! And Seunghyun was innocent! You were the one driving, but he was a mere passenger in your car! And he died because you, an imcompetent nincompoop, drank liquor, drove and crashed into a tree! And you know what bugs me? It's the fact that he lost his life but you escaped with nary a scratch? Why is it such an unjust world? Why couldn't you have died instead? Why????!!!!" His voice was rising with every single sentence and by the time he ended his angry tirade, his voice was comparable to that of an opera singer. Ryeowook panted heavily and eyed Kyuhyun with hatred. He had suppressed his emotions for a year already, and it felt great to be able to release them finally. Cho Kyuhyun-Ryeowook could feel nothing but anger and hatred towards his former boyfriend.
While Ryeowook was fuming, Kyuhyun felt his heart being torn cruelly into a thousand pieces. Ryeowook's spiteful words dealt a hard blow to him. They were like a sharp knife, piercing through his heart and leaving an eternal scar there. "Do you really dislike me this much?" he asked, his voice quivering with hurt.
Ryeowook stopped short and threw him a sidelong glance before replying hardly,"No. I HATE you. Get out off my life."
"But..."Kyuhyun protested weakly.
"You heard me. Get out of here, get out of this house. NOW." Ryeowook threatened him menacingly, pointing a shaky finger towards the front door.
Kyuhyun, hoping to avoid aggravating Ryeowook any furthur, took the cue to leave. As he neared the door, he stopped and turned around. With eyes full of love and regret, he murmured,"I'm sorry."
Ryeowook heard the front door close shut gently. Rubbing his temples, he sank down on his bed and gritted his teeth together. "Kyuhyun's right, it's not his fault. It's my fault for dating him in the first place. If I didn't date him, he would not have driven Seunghyun back to our house...It's my fault.
Ryeowook heard his phone ringing. "Stupid Kyuhyun," he cursed. He ignored his ringing phone and just stared blankly up at the ceiling. "Seunghyun, I miss you so much. Why did you leave me? Why couldn't...couldn't Kyuhyun have went in your place instead?" A tear dropped out from the corner of Ryeowook's eye. Clenching his fist, he wished that Kyuhyun was here again, so that he could punch that guy.
His phone stopped ringing, only to start again less than ten secounds later. Damn that Cho Kyuhyun! An irate Ryeowook picked up the call and screamed,"Cho Kyuhyun, you idiot, stop calling! I don't want to hear from you ever again!" He slammed his phone shut, not forgetting to turn it off first.
Ryeowook left his room to get a glass of water. When he passsed by Kyuhyun's room, he felt a nagging urge to enter it. His legs defied his mind and stalked into Kyuhyun's room.
It had been a long time since he entered Kyuhyun's room. Nothing had changed. Ryeowook spied a small diary on Kyuhyun's table. "Urgh...No, don't touch it, even if he's my foe, I have no right to read his private thoughts..." Ryeowook muttered to himself. Yet once again, he found himself cautiously flipping open the pages of Kyuhyun's diary.
Inside, Kyuhyun had written about many of their times together. In spite of himself, Ryeowook smiled when he recollected some of their past shared moments. Then his eyes fell on a particular page.
It was the entry about the night Seunghyun died.
"Dear Diary, Seunghyun died today. I really depressed...It's all my fault! I remember that Seunghyun had asked me to meet him at a club. He drank a lot, but I didn't as I had to drive the both of us back together. However, I felt a little tipsy when I left the club. I brushed it off thoug, thinking it was a fainting spell. I think we were driving along a road when I crashed into a tree...but I can't recollect anything about it! I only remember waking up in a hospital and Ryeowook bawling that Seunghyun was dead. I must have been drunk...But I didn't drink anything! What happened? Oh wait...did Seunghyun slip something into my drink? But why would he? There's no other reason though...and when I returned from the toilet, I saw him pouring something into my drink, which he vehemently denied about. Why would he want to frame me? Why? I'm his brother's lover after all. Hey, wait up. Didn't Seunghyun just lose a promotion to me? After all, he was displeased when I got promoted instead of him? Is that it? Should I tell Ryeowook? I'd better not...I don't want him to destroy the perfect image he has of Seunghyun in his mind...Help! I'm so confused!"
Ryeowook slammed the diary shut. "So it WAS Seunghyun's fault...Not Kyuhyun's. I've been wrong about him all along! Oh no! Kyuhyun, I'm so sorry!"
Just then, their house phone rang. Ryeowook dashed out of the room and yanked the phone up, almost disconnecting the wire in the process. "Hello Kyuhyun, I'm sorry, I found out the truth!"
There was silence at the other end of the line, then a voice continued,"Is this the residence of Cho Kyuhyun?"
"Yes..." Ryeowook felt his heart lurch. He had a bad premonition about this.
"This is the police. We've found the body of Cho Kyuhyun. We think that he was killed in a robbery attempt..."
Ryeowook clutched at the phone. His whole body turned cold. "I b-beg y-you pardon?" he cried out, stuttering.
"He was found dead in an alley. He was stabbed in the heart and died due to loss of blood. His valuables were all taken away and he was found with a bouquet of purple hyacinths. We need you to come down and identify the body."
"I'll be there!" Ryeowook hung up and scurried out of the house hastily.
"Please, please let it not be Kyuhyun..." Ryeowook prayed fervently on the bus. He turned on his phone and saw that he had 4 missed calls. All were dialled by Kyuhyun.
"Ryeowook, I'm so sorry, it was my fault. Please forgive me. I-I love you."
The second call,"Ryeowook, I'm coming back from the florist. There's a man shadowing me...I'm scared. Are you still angry? Can I come up now? I'll only come up when you tell me to."
"R-ryeowook..." heavy panting was heard from the other end of the line,"That man...he's trying to rob me. May I come up now? I'm really sorry!"
"Ryeowook..." Kyuhyun's voice was weak and he coughed."I'm really sorry. I brought so much pain to you...You're right. I should have died instead. I'm really sorry...I don't think I'll survive this ordeal...that bastard stabbed me and ran off with my money. I'm really afraid I won't see you ever again...I want you to know, I'll always love you."
The all ended. A tear fell from Ryeowook's eyes. Then another. Then another. "Stupid Kyuhyun, I don't deserve your love, why are you so good to me?" By this time, Ryeowook was sobbing like an uncontrollable waterfall. Even when he was going to die...he still called me to tell me how much he loved me! Why was I so selfish? If I had picked up the call, he needn't have died! I'm sorry, Kyuhyun...
Ryeowook got off at the police station and he felt his heart pounding as he trailed after the police to identify the body. It was Kyuhyun. Ryeowook felt his heart skip a beat.
Kneeling down at the younger man's side, Ryeowook brushed his hair away gently and held his hand, only to find a bunch of purple hyacinths in it.
Purple hyacinths...the flowers whose language were "I'm sorry"...
He realised that there was a card attached to it. Flipping it open, he fount that Kyuhyun had written a message in his own blood," Dear Ryeowook, I'm so sorry. I love you. I don't think I'll survive. So before I die, I want to let you know how much you mean to me. I never blamed you for hating me...It was my fault. Please carry on with your life and forget me. I'm just a bastard who ruined your life. And Seunghyun's too. I'm sorry...I love you."
Ryeowook buried his head into Kyuhyun's chest, his dried up tears once again finding their way down his cheeks. Oblivious to the fact that the police officers were watching. Planting a kiss on Kyuhyun's forehead, he whispered,"I'm so sorry too...Please forgive me. I love you too."
The End
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How did you guys find it? Hope you enjoyed it! The lyrics at the start of the fanfic are from S.H.E's 我们怎么了。 Thank you for reading! I love you guys.
Labels: Kyuwook, Repost
